Alright, so I watched the movie on Thursday and now that it's officially released, I'm gonna write my review.




First of all, it was pretty much as I expected. I can't honestly say that it was a good movie because really, the plot was kinda your typical Hollywood butchering of a classic story. That's not to say the movie wasn't entertaining but aside from that, not much to say about the "good-ness" of the movie.

And to be fair, whether the movie is good or not, people are gonna watch it because it's Jet Li and Jackie Chan. In the same movie. And they fight. Period. Money will be made from this combination alone.

Jet Li as Monkey King = epic WIN! I love him in that role. Some may say that Jackie would've fit the role better but I really love Jet Li as comedic characters. His laughter is infectious and he just has so much FUN with those roles, which totally shows through.

Now, things that bothered me (and there are many):
1) Why was there English in this movie? How and why can ancient Chinese people suddenly start speaking and understanding modern day English? It was so random and ridiculous. And only certain people had this magical English-understanding power. Bothered me sooooooooo much.

2) The premise. I'm okay with the fact that they changed elements of "Journey to the West" because this isn't a remake of the story, but they changed really essential elements. For anyone who knows Sun Wukong, they'd know that he wouldn't simply just place his staff down. He'd shrink the thing and put it in his ear. It's what he does. It's part of his character. It makes no sense for him to do otherwise.

2b) How the hell did Wukong's staff end up in South Boston? Seriously, how? I sense a convenient plothole.

3) Time-travelling. If you believe in the plot of the movie, then in an alternate history, the "Journey to the West" story never happened because Sun Wukong was never released from his stone state. The Druken Immortal never became immortal. The reign of the Jade Warrior continued until present time and all of China was at his mercy. And all of this occurred until what's-his-name was born and found the staff. Don't mess with time, people!

4) Golden Sparrow. I think she's a good actress and is absolutely gorgeous, but her character was kinda pointless. She claimed to have seen the Jade Warrior kill her mother when she was at the bottom of a well? Another convenient plothole. And she just happens to have the one weapon that can kill an immortal?!?! Wow, how convenient is that? What makes this seemingly normal looking jade hairpin so powerful? No clue. As far as I can tell, it's made of fake jade because it fell from a relatively high place and didn't shatter.

5) White Witch. Again, cool character but not essential to the story. Any lacky of the Jade Warrior would've done. She wasn't even his lacky; more like his hired help, as in she isn't neccessarily loyal to him. She's just in it for the elixer.

6) Elixer of immortality. Jackie's character explained from the very beginning that just one sip of the elixer was enough to grant immortality. So why did what's-his-name and the White Witch have to fight to the death over a whole jar of elixer? What's-his-name didn't even have the common sense to point this out. I understand that the villans would've still wanted to fight but you gotta at least mention it. Otherwise, it just looks like you're being negligent of your own story details.

6) Ending. Sap!!! Pure sap!!! Golden Sparrow girl living right there in Chinatown? Seriously?!?! Dripping with sap.

Ok, I'm done ranting now.