Okay, I watched Letterman tonight for the Orlando-ness. It was really cute 'cause Letterman was commenting on how Orlando's always in period films, meaning costumes, and then Orlando walks out with a policeman costume on. It was funny and damn, did he look sexy.

His next guest was Jack Hanna, who is clearly not the brightest crayon in the box. Anyway, he had a cute baby otter on and let it wade water in a baby pool because he didn't know if it could swim yet or not. You would think that an "animal expert" such as he would know but nope, he had no clue. After the commercial break, he placed two small armadillos on Letterman's desk. They proceed to have sex, right on camera. Jack separated them and then decided, "Armadillo mating is rare to see so let's leave them alone and watch." That image will forever be burned into my brain. Just so you all know, an armadillo penis is thin and really, really long.